It’s times like these I kind of miss God. The last time I briefly believed was twenty-five years ago. But Catholicism is such a monumental thing that even a brief return to belief has great repercussions. I went to mass one Christmas morning and was overwhelmed by the mystery of the Incarnation. I wanted to be a parent. I returned to my loft on Canal Street and with jubilation informed my wife. This wasn’t our bargain. She was a Jewish atheist who believed all atheists were alike but all Catholics were Puerto Rican. Our marriage was doomed.